3. Hur du som högkänslig kan må bra trots världens konflikter och Trump – med Bethany Hawkins

I detta avsnitt av Konfliktfrihet samtalar Evelina med Bethany Hawkins om hur det är att leva som svart högkänslig kvinna i USA under Donald Trumps presidentskap. Bethany delar sina personliga erfarenheter av otrygghet, rädsla och motståndskraft, samt hur hon kanaliserar sin kraft genom att lyfta underrepresenterade röster via sin podcastproduktionsfirma, Crackers in Soup.

Tillsammans diskuterar vi hur vi som högkänsliga kvinnor kan hantera stress, oro och konflikter för att skapa inre frid och bygga resiliens, även i en orolig värld. En inspirerande och insiktsfull konversation om mod, rättvisa och mental hälsa – lyssna nu!

Vem är Bethany?
Bethany Hawkins är VD och grundare av Crackers In Soup, LLC. Som svart kvinna vet hon hur det känns att inte bli hörd – därför är hennes mission att lyfta underrepresenterade röster genom podcasting. Hennes firma har producerat flera prisbelönta poddar, inklusive Chatting Over Chowder och Sis, Please. Crackers In Soup har nominerats till flera prestigefyllda priser och vann Big Budget Sound Award från Sonic Bloom, presenterat av Libsyn på She Podcast. Bethany är en uppskattad föreläsare och har talat på evenemang som Podfest, Afros & Audio, She Podcast och The Podcast Academy. Hon har också varit domare för välkända podcastutmärkelser som The Ambies och Black Podcasters Awards.

Du hittar Bethany här:

www.crackersinsoup.com
https://www.linkedin.com/in/crackersinsoup/
https://www.instagram.com/bcrackersinsoup/

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Mer om podden:

Välkommen till en podd för högkänsliga kvinnor som längtar efter ett konfliktfritt liv. Jag, Evelina Åström – tidigare kurator och socionom, nu internationell författare och traumamedveten ledarskapsmentor – lyfter fram rösterna hos högkänsliga kvinnor som, genom sin inre drivkraft, omdefinierar ledarskap och skapar en mer välmående, fredlig och rättvis värld! Tillsammans dyker vi in i djupa samtal om att omfamna sin högkänslighet, följa sin inre vägledning, navigera konflikter och motstånd, bygga villkorslösa relationer och att använda våra unika gåvor för att skapa ett mer konfliktfritt liv. Nya avsnitt varje vecka!

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Tipsa mig här om du har sett en publik konfrontation online som du har reagerat på, eller om du har en egen konflikt som du önskar stöd och råd kring i ett kommande avsnitt: https://www.speakpipe.com/konfliktfrihet

Vill du vara med och bygga en gemenskap av högkänsliga kvinnor som skapar ett konfliktfritt liv tillsammans? Gå med i vårt community och diskutera veckans avsnitt på https://evelinaastrom.com/podcast. Där hittar du också mer info om hur du kan jobba med mig som coach och mentor.

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Vill du komma i kontakt med mig? Maila mig på podcast@evelinaastrom.com.

Musik av Music_for_video från Pixabay

Transcript:

Bethany

0:00

When Trump was elected in office in November of 2024, we actually had our meeting the very next day, and for the first 15 minutes, you truly just sat and held space for me because I just cried. I was so despondent, and not only for myself as a Black woman who has Black children and a Black husband, but for the people who are trans, for the people who need services, for people who aren't able-bodied.

Evelina

Warm welcome to Konfliktfrihet, a podcast for highly sensitive women with big hearts who want to thrive and make a difference—without conflict stopping them from following their hearts and achieving success.

My name is Evelina Åström. I’m a former counselor and social worker, now an international author and trauma-informed leadership mentor. In this podcast, you’ll find inspiring conversations, tips, and tools to embrace your sensitivity and resolve conflicts in a way that feels right in your heart while keeping calm in your body. Are you ready to discover how to become conflict-free? Let’s dive in!

Evelina

1:33

Welcome to a new episode of Konfliktfrihet. Today is a special episode—I’m inviting a guest from the U.S. to talk about what it’s like to live in the U.S. with Trump as president. And in the Just Me segment, we’ll talk about how you, as a highly sensitive person, can take care of yourself when the world is full of conflict and contribute to peace and harmony in a much easier way than you might think. Now, I’ll switch to English.

Evelina

2:06

I am beyond excited to introduce you to someone who has been an important part of my own podcast journey, Bethany Hawkins. Hello and welcome to Konfliktfrihet, Bethany.

Bethany

2:19

Thank you so much for having me. I missed your face. I missed hearing you speak in Swedish. Oh.

Bethany

2:28

Is it Swedish or Sweden?

Evelina

2:30

Swedish. Swedish.

Bethany

2:32

I missed it all.

Evelina

2:33

And you were excited about Fika as well. Tell me, what type of Fika do you have today?

Bethany

2:38

So I have two Fikas. I have water with like a little bit of energy in it. And I also have black coffee with some protein in it.

Evelina

2:53

Okay, protein. Ah.

Bethany

2:56

So I like to, I like to volley between hot and cold.

Bethany

3:00

Because I'm just always a weirdo. So I like walk around with a hot beverage and a cold beverage at all times.

Evelina

3:08

Oh, but you're not weird.

Bethany

3:11

Thank you. I appreciate that.

Evelina

3:13

I have a friend and we always drink both tea and coffee at the same time. We like to have both options available.

Bethany

3:24

I love that.

Evelina

3:26

Yeah. I'm drinking coffee with a little biscuit. And the coffee I'm drinking is from this season's sponsor, Svanfelts Kaffe. What I love about them is that they donate 10 Swedish kroner per kilo of coffee and tea sold to Hjärnfonden, the Brain Foundation. Plus, they are sponsoring the first season with a sample box of their delicious coffee, which I'll be giving away to one of you listeners in the last episode of this season. To enter the giveaway and have a chance to win, all you need to do is write a review of Conflictfrihet wherever you listen to podcasts and tell us why you enjoyed the show.

Evelina

4:12

Then take a screenshot of your review and share it on Instagram or Facebook using the hashtag Conflictfrihet. The winner will be contacted via DM there. And I'd love to know what are you listeners thinking? Are you a coffee or tea lover? Or do you like to drink hot and cold together as Bethany?

Evelina

4:34

It would be fun if you shared a picture of yourself listening to the podcast on social media using the hashtag Konfliktfrihet. That would help every one of us that listen to this show to connect with each other.

Evelina

4:48

So Bethany, you are someone who truly leads with your heart and is such an inspiration for so many women. Bethany, can you tell the listeners a little bit of who you are and what you do?

Bethany

5:00

Sure. My name is Bethany Hawkins. I am from the United States. I only speak one language because I'm lame. And I have my own podcast production company called Crackers in Soup. So Evelina talks about coffee. I talk about crackers and soup, which is nothing to do with food and everything to do with podcast production. So I help marginalized voices get their voices heard via podcasting.

Evelina

5:29

I think it's just amazing, your mission. And that's why I also talk about you leading with your heart because it's so beautiful.

Evelina

5:39

Let's talk about the situation in U.S. For a moment. What's happening right now in the U.S. Is being called a crisis of democracy. Some described it as a coup or the rise of an oligarchy, perhaps even fascist. Like, what is going on?

Bethany

5:56

I wish I could give you a definitive answer because I truly and utterly do not know. And this comes full circle because when Trump was elected in office in November of 2024, we actually had our meeting the very next day.

Evelina

6:16

I know we did.

Bethany

6:17

And for the first 15 minutes, you truly just sat and held space for me because I just cried. I was so despondent. And not only for myself as a Black woman who has Black children and a Black husband, but for the people who are trans.

Evelina

6:42

Yeah.

Bethany

6:43

For the people who need services. For people who aren't able bodied. I saw the disintegration of everything that this country has to offer for migrant workers, for people who have come here legally and illegally. When Trump shared what he wanted to do, I saw the horror in it. And so many people were saying, oh, he's just kidding about this, but this is what he's really trying to say. Which is shocking to me because I'm like, he means what he says. And to find people that were alibying for him or trying to make him be in a greater light or to understand him on a different level, I have the inability to do that. And I believe that there are good people who voted for him for some reason. And I can't comprehend that reason. Especially if they're friends of mine, especially if they've been to my house, especially if we've had coffee together, if we've had experiences together. Because you are voting for somebody who's against everything that my family is and or believes in.

Bethany

8:13

So it's been really hard trying to come to an understanding of, A, how this even happened.

Bethany

8:21

Like, what? What happened? What episode of The Twilight Zone is this? And how can we get out of it?

Evelina

8:28

I think the whole world is shocked because what he has done in so small amount of days in his position is crazy. And I mean, it's not only affecting individuals and institutions, it's also affecting, like, countries.

Bethany

8:46

Yeah… I have friends that are married to same-sex individuals who have children with autism who are greatly concerned about their if their marriage is going to be a legitimate marriage under his presidency, if he's going to dissolve their marriage. Yeah. I have friends who have ADHD who's worried about their medication because they're just this week a person who is in charge of health care in this country said that lateral isn't really helpful to anybody.

Evelina

9:24

Because he's also putting people without really the competence on different positions, right? Correct. It just sounds so scary in my ears to like hear you can put like people that are just don't really have competence but maybe support Trump and that is scary.

Bethany

9:43

There is somebody that he brought into a position that was on the real world. MTV's The Real World. And I'm like, really? Is this what we're doing now? What's happening?

Evelina

9:57

Yeah. Let's go back for a moment to the day after the election when we had our session.

I remember logging onto our call completely unaware of what had just happened because I usually avoid the news to protect myself emotionally as a highly sensitive person. And I remember you saying you were not doing very well and you told me about the election and tears just stream down your face. And I felt so shocked. Like it was like I was still believing he will not be your next president. And I think it was the first time I truly understood how deeply frightening Trump's power was for so many people who were living in a country where democracy suddenly felt so fragile. And as a citizen of Sweden, we might not fully understand what it's like to live in the US right now. And one thing that you said to me that day was you were actually so afraid of what he will do to the country that you actually was thinking of leaving the country with your family because you felt unsafe. And I think those words was just so, it just hit me so much. Do you still want to leave America or is it something you have left behind now?

Bethany

11:32

My husband and I have discussions. I mean, we have a teenage daughter, we have a teenage son, we have a son that's in his early 20s, and I'm more so greatly concerned for them because I'm in my late 40s.

Evelina

11:52

Yeah.

Bethany

11:53

And I've established my life. My concern is the impact that it's going to have on my daughter's reproductive care, on if there, God forbid, is a war that my sons are going to be drafted. Yeah. If they bring a draft back. So we we've had these discussions. We haven't finalized our thoughts, but the discussions are definitely there. And continuing. Again, I hope for the best.

Evelina

12:26

Yeah.

Bethany

12:27

But these conversations are so important, especially in regards to conflict.

Evelina

12:32

Yeah, it is.

Bethany

And how to work through this. Because it's traumatizing, especially when you come across somebody who has completely opposing views. You have to determine if you want to continue to have them in your life. And if you do, how do you speak with them and to them on topics that are hard? So I think that this podcast is so vital.

Evelina

13:00

I remember that before the election, at least, people were really divided about Trump. Would you say that that has changed since all the things that he's done until now?

Bethany

13:10

I feel personally that it is still the same. I don't think that he has the empathy or wants to have the empathy or understanding of what it's like to be somebody other than a rich, old, white guy. That's when everything becomes self-centered and self-serving.

And that's where I kind of have a hard time with the divide as well, because many of the people who did not vote for him are educated. Many of the people who did not vote for him understand how tariffs work.

A lot of the people who did not vote for him understand how Medicaid and Medicare work. They understand how the services work. And if you're unwilling to educate yourself before you step into that voting booth, I don't know how to bridge that gap. Because educated people aren't going to become uneducated. But they're not just going to all of a sudden wake up and forget all of the knowledge that they have. No. The real knowledge of how the Constitution works, which is the foundation of America.

Evelina

14:30

It's just so ironic. And also that it backfires on himself all the time and his own country. He's showing many times that he doesn't really care about the rules of law or like regulations, international law and so on. So I totally understand that it is a scary time for many people in America right now that are educated because that is a key, I think, to be educated and to get information learned. About democracy in school is like one of the key points in having a democracy. And if you're uneducated, you might not really understand what's going on and and how things should be done.

Bethany

15:16

And even in the education in America, there is a significant disparity between where you live in the education that you receive. If you have educators who are just doing the bare minimum, they're not excited about the curriculum, they're not excited about teaching because the wage is so low. So as a parent, it's up to me that if they're not teaching such and such at school, that I have to take the onus on myself, okay, and teach either my children or get them somewhat interested so that they're learning another perspective. These are all things that are going to be reflected upon learning.

Evelina

16:01

Yeah, and this is actually something that is a hot topic in Sweden as well. So I think this was really great to bring up for Swedes to think about.

Bethany

16:10

Absolutely. In order to thrive, education is needed. And it's not just collegiate, go to college and work in tech. No, education also includes trade.

Evelina

16:24

Yeah.

Bethany

16:24

We have to learn not only mathematics and reading fundamentals, but you also have to learn how to think outside of what somebody is telling you. Yeah. You have to learn how to research. You have to learn things like they've taken home economics out of schools and like sewing and cooking and. Oh. But those things are so vital to everyday life. And that just makes for a better community. And it makes for a better economy. And the word economy, people always think about finances. The word economy is community working together.

Evelina

17:05

Oh, yes.

Bethany

17:06

Eco is the Greek word for home. So it's your home coming together.

Evelina

17:13

Oh, that's so beautiful.

Bethany

17:15

And that's how we get better leaders. That's why we get people that are fighting for you as the person.

Because when you're in it and you're like, am I crazy? Am I crazy for being horrified by all of this? And then you see other leaders, other world leaders that are thriving, countries are thriving and doing so well, and they are equally as horrified as a large percentage of the citizens for the United States.

Evelina

18:02

Yeah, don't doubt yourself.

Bethany

18:04

It's like, okay, thank you. Thank you for making me feel validated.

Evelina

18:11

Because that's a scary thing as well. I mean, it's just been days with him in the office and in two years, it could be a norm. By then you might have started to doubt yourself, you start to just accept the reality as it is, because that's just a normal reaction as well to a situation that isn't normal. I think that's why it's important as a Swede to just shout and tell you that it's not normal. Don't doubt yourself and keep going, keep raising your voices.

Bethany

18:50

Thank you. That was perfectly said. Thank you.

Evelina

18:54

And I think that's also why I felt I needed to do this episode, because, I mean, this podcast is called Konfliktfrihet. And if this isn't a conflict, then what is? Like, what?

Bethany

19:12

What's a conflict if this isn't a conflict?

Evelina

19:19

So when I'm reading the news about U.S., I also see something that brings me hope. I think in every state, I saw that people were protesting against Trump and his decisions. There is lawsuits that have been filed against him and all the illegal actions that he's doing. And I mean, some of them is blocked by the court. That's a light in this darkness. And also, I saw that there was some polls showing that public disapproval is growing against Trump and his decisions. It wasn't like a big numbers, but still. I wanted to ask you, is there anything that you find comfort in when being in this situation in the USA?

Bethany

20:11

In order for me to keep my sanity, I have to continue to live my life.

I cannot allow this to consume me.

Evelina

20:25

Yeah.

Bethany

20:25

So I make changes where I can make changes. I have conversations if I have the bandwidth to have conversations.

Bethany

20:36

And I will make moves that are vital for myself and my family.

Evelina

20:43

Yeah.

Bethany

20:45

Other than that, I'm just living. I'm just waking up in the morning,

Bethany

20:50

taking a shower, brushing my teeth, having coffee with protein in it, having some ice water too, and going along with my dad.

Evelina

21:01

But I think that's important, keeping it as normal as possible, even though stuff happens around the world right now. Yes.

Bethany

21:09

I will not let this consume me. I can't. I can't let it consume me.

Evelina

21:12

No. And I think also, I mean, your business, you're channeling so much of that energy of wanting to support marginalized people and so on in your mission in Crackers and Soup. And I'm guessing you get some comfort in that as well to giving people a voice. Can you tell us more about what inspired you to focus on amplifying underrepresented voices and how you see podcasting as a tool for that?

Bethany

21:44

I was in the corporate world for almost 20 years, and I had to hide a lot of my normal mannerisms because it was a very older, white, male industry. And I did not want to do that anymore. It was at the expense of my mental health and my energy. So I decided that I was going to create my own company. And in that company, I was going to help people find the voice that I always wanted to utilize. And I've been so stinking blessed 112,000 times over to be able to do that because I get to choose clients that I want to work with. I get to hear their stories before anybody else. I get to look people dead in their eyes and tell them, you can do this. You don't think that you can do this, but you have this in you and your message needs to be told. You're moving mountains one recording at a time. And I say it is such an honor and a blessing to be able to walk hand in hand with clients like you who are truly changing the world because it's a ripple effect. So somebody listens to what you're sharing and then they feel good about that and then they go out and they're feeling good. So they're making somebody else feel good and then that person is making somebody else feel good. And it just, it just dominoes and spirals into this like feel good moment when all you did was hit record and cheer your genius.

Bethany

23:31

And it's like, you did that. Yeah.

And I did that. I helped you do that. Yeah.

And your listener did that because they listened to you. It's such a circle of pulling people up when right now the news just wants us to concentrate on people pulling each other down.

Evelina

23:53

Yeah. I was thinking of that too when you were speaking. Like, it's such an important thing you do in your business when supporting people to believe in their voice and actually start recording. Because I think so many people out there are having the thought of like, it would be fun with a podcast. But they are maybe not really feeling comfortable of hearing their own voice or speaking about sensitive topics that just feel scary to put out there. But it's important to do that more than ever right now and to be a positive voice out there when there is so much conflicts.

Bethany

24:31

Yes. It's a journey of empowerment. It truly, truly is. And if you have one person listen to you or three billion people listening to you, you are absolutely making a positive impact when you set your intention to do so.

Evelina

24:46

Yeah, absolutely.

Evelina

24:48

Oh, Bethany, thank you so much for sharing your story and your wisdom and your mission to us. You have been such a guide and inspiration for me when creating my podcast and for all the listeners for listening to you today. Where can people find you and learn more about Crackers in Soup if they want to follow your work?

Bethany

25:10

You can find me on the website, www.crackersinsoup.com. So crackersinsoup.com.

Evelina

25:20

Perfect. And I will put the links in the show notes as well.

Evelina
25:25
Hey, Evelina here. I just want to quickly pause the episode to tell you about my amazing community where like-minded highly sensitive women like you gather to support each other in a safe space and discuss this week’s episode with me.

If you prefer to work with me one-on-one as a coach and mentor, you can find out how to do that at evelinaastrom.com/podcast. There, you can also read more about the community. The link is in the show notes.

Now, back to the episode. It’s time for our cozy moment—Is it just me?

Evelina
26:00
Welcome to Is it just me?—a segment where we explore what’s really happening in the conflicts and confrontations you face so that you can feel less alone and gain clarity on how to resolve them.

Today's episode is based on a question that came in:
"Is it just me who feels deeply affected by the conflicts that Trump and other world leaders are creating right now?"

And no, you are not alone. I have personally felt very affected by the state of the world and downhearted without really understanding why—because nothing in my life should be making me feel this way. Not even my period was coming up, for heaven’s sake!

Until I realized—it wasn’t my emotions.

As highly sensitive people, we absorb the sorrow, suffering, and fear that so many in the world are feeling right now.

Evelina
26:56
So how can we, as highly sensitive people, feel good and spread light instead of being dragged down into all the darkness right now?

I think the most important thing to start with is reminding yourself: These are not my emotions. I live in safety, and I am okay.

Because sometimes, we get so deeply pulled into other people’s emotions that we actually forget they aren’t our own. We almost become one with the world's suffering.

Then, I think you should ask yourself: What do I need right now to feel good?

If I had to guess, I’m pretty sure you need to feel hope. You need connection. You need a sense of security.

So how do you give yourself that?

For example, by asking someone you love for a long hug. Or by going for a walk and choosing to focus on all the beauty you appreciate in nature while you walk.

Evelina
27:59
That way, you ground yourself in the present moment and in the place on Earth where you are right now.

Evelina
28:06
And that is very helpful.

Evelina
28:09
It also helps regulate your nervous system.

Another important thing is choosing how you take in the news.

It’s important to stay informed, but news reporting is often angled in a way that creates worry and fear.

Evelina
28:27
And fear breeds more fear.

We want to read more and more news. And many news outlets know that this sells. They use headlines that scare us a little, making us feel the need to find out more.

Evelina
28:46
And that’s exactly how darkness expands too.

But you can decide to take in the news in a different way.

Evelina
28:55
You could, for example, ask a partner or friend—someone who watches the news and doesn’t find it overwhelming—to give you a brief summary of anything important you should know.

Or you can choose to follow news from a reliable, independent news source that also highlights stories of hope.

We need to listen to news from someone who weakens the power of all the darkness—who makes the darkness seem less threatening or undefeatable.

Evelina
29:32
We need to listen to news that highlights the missteps of these leaders. That lifts us up. That gives us hope for the future.

You can also focus on everything that is progressing.

I’m not saying you should deny what is happening in the world right now. But if someone feels the need to talk about a distressing news story—or if you find yourself stuck in a cycle of reading terrifying news that makes you anxious and afraid—then make sure to also look for news about the counterforces to that conflict.

There are always people making a difference and creating light in the darkness.

We need to hold on to hope and help others see it too.

We need to see and hear about resilience—because it exists.

Evelina
31:29
And it's also important to help others trust their own feelings.

It’s okay to feel that something is wrong, regardless of what experts and leaders say.

If you have a friend in a country where the situation is unsafe, reach out and acknowledge their experiences. Let them know that what’s happening now should not be normalized.

No matter what misinformation and propaganda they hear, what is happening is not okay. And you can help them gain perspective on that.

Evelina
31:49
Another thing that can help lift us out of this is knowing that we can make a difference in some way.

I chose to make this episode to try to make a difference.

Because we all can do something.

What can you do to spread light and hope?

It could be supporting an organization, having a conversation within your circle, spreading positive initiatives, or building a community.

Evelina
31:29
So how do you handle people who completely disagree with you?

Evelina
31:34
People who might be against your values?

Like in the example you mentioned—where someone in your daily life opposes everything you stand for and does not have good intentions toward people like you.

How do you handle them?

Evelina
31:49
It is completely okay to distance yourself from people who negatively affect you and your well-being.

Evelina
31:57
Feminine leadership is about taking responsibility for your own well-being and not forcing things.

You don’t gain anything by trying to make others change their opinions.

Evelina
32:10
We do gain by standing firmly in what we perceive and believe, without letting others make us feel less worthy or doubt our own opinions and thoughts.

You are you. Stand strong in that. It will make your light shine even brighter.

Evelina
32:27
You can also do inner work to be able to stand strong within yourself.

That involves looking at the fears that might come up.

And that is something I help you with in my mentorship program, Guardians of Feminine Light. So check it out!

Evelina
32:47
Finally, let’s have trust.

Trust that more people are waking up and not supporting this kind of leadership.

Trust that the truth always comes out.

And how does trust feel?

For me, trust feels like relaxation.

It’s a sense of calm and safety.

Evelina
33:10
And in a world that is uncertain, it is important to find that feeling.

So that you can spread security to those around you.

It can also mean building community with others who see the world as you do.

Because we are not alone—we are many.

And together, we can create a brighter future.

Evelina
34:01
Choose to take in news in a way that brings hope.

Evelina
34:05
That’s all for today! Now I’m super excited for the weekend—because guess what? I’m going folk dancing with my husband all weekend! I’m so looking forward to it.

Let me know your weekend plans! Leave a comment on the podcast or send me a message on Instagram—I love hearing from you!

Evelina
34:47
You don’t have to navigate confrontation alone.

So share this episode with a friend!

And if you want to know more about our community and how you can work with me as a coach and mentor, check out evelinaastrom.com/podcast.

See you soon!